Sonnet to Sean

You were my sun, my son, my light, and love;
As golden as the summer’s brightest day.
And striking as a shooting star above,
Forever changed the night you blazed away.
Grief turned the light to darkness when you died.
I swallowed grief and made it part of me;
I fed it fear and locked it deep inside.
Grief grew until I almost ceased to be.

Time turned the days to weeks, and months to years.
And yet with time, the deepest grief will wane;
The darkness fades to dawn that quiets fears
And light seeps gently in to ease my pain.
Now with the shining stars that grace the night,
You’ll be my star, my son, my love, and light.

The Bench

On a concrete bench beside a lake
A mother sits in grief’s heartbreak.
Words carved in granite at her feet.
She pays no mind to summer’s heat.
She pauses here in autumn’s chill
Alone she sits in winter’s still.
Alone she sits in quiet peace,
Glad for the honking of the geese
Intruding on her reverie,
Bringing back sweet memory
Of young hands tossing crumbs to ground,
As ducks and geese would crowd around.
The boy is gone; the man has passed.
The bench beside the lake will last.

Sean 1981 - 2006

He was my son,
Not my only son,
But my oldest one.

He was difficult;
He was different;
He was beautiful;
He was gifted;
He is gone.

Not gone like,
"I’ll see you later,
Mom."

But gone like,
Ashes in a box
That I keep
On the table
By the sofa
In the living room.

I should call it
Something else now.